DIE! YOU FUCKING BASTARDS!

Darren Ho (Of "August Man" Fame) , You Are My Hero! Apart From That Huggy Korean Boyz Or The Rent Boyz
As it is, I was already feeling sick, despondent, tired, fed-up, pent-up, aimless, nothingness, etc, etc, the whole works.

I am tired of moving house ever so often and dealing with all the bimbs and wimps. I am tired of waiting for what may or may not even come my way. I am tired of not being able to get a suitable teaching job. I am tired of the gays I meet who I know I am only bedding for sex and nothing more. I am tired of hearing grumbles and the same old news over and over again. I am tired of meeting the people whom I know I shouldn't be meeting.

In a word, I am just DEAD TIRED. When I think of Leela, The Gila, The Voodoo, Moodoo, Woodoo, it didn't help bring on a smile either.And I was miming to her all this time. Like on Saturday night. She asked if I was married so I placed two fingers together, slapped, punched and hit and separated my fingers again, meaning to tell her how fruitless it would be for me to get together with a GALL (that is how much I HATE GALLS). But she took it that I divorced and has a son. *WHAT IDIOCY, LEELA THE VOODOO MOODOO KOODOO GILA!

Even news of an impending suit against the NKF didn't cheer me up. I thought it was just some play-acting and we all know the actors and actresses are good friends. And we all have been had all this while. So enough already.

We are sick and tired of watching your antics, for FUCKING GOD's sake. Maybe for a change, we should be the actors and actresses. You watch us. See how you feel.

You live among the foreigners. You open up your houses to them, let them live in them and you go entertain them. You rub shoulders with them in the public places and you go kiss their arses. We have had enough!

So today, as I was pacing up and down the library, when my original plans ran askew because of the wet weather, I WAS BORED AND UTTERLY despondent. What else is new? MOE hires bimbos and wimps?

I would love to stay home in this wet weather, read, fix myself a meal, relax, watch TV, listen to music and surf the NET. Regular stuff ALL PEOPLE DO in their homes. And I don't spend so much money this way too.

When it is absolutely necessary and vital, I venture out to be among HUMANITY! But THIS HAPPENS NOT TO BE ME HOME!

I am not among people I wanna be with. My beau, my adopted son and so on.

The only piece of good news I got that cheered me just a little was: CALIFORNIA FITNESS IS GIVING OUT THIS FREE CALI-BEAR! I thought about how lonely I was on me bed. How I missed out on the Korean boy's smooch and how perhaps a fluffy furry toy bear could ease me OUT OF MY DESPONDENCY A LITTLE - just a little!

Then I picked up a copy of the January issue of "August Man". And there he was again! His half face curled up in a terrible, terrible frown. As usual, he wrote with spit and fire. I wished he was more caustic, more toxic, EVEN MORE VOLCANO ERUPTION-like. I told myself I must know this guy! But how?

He was just like this other guy I knew at the cybercafe. He was an angry young man and I have seen him spit out all his frustrations and anger in ONE SWIFT MOMENT. I had wanted to walk up to him and talk to him. But I didn't get the chance and I don't see him around anymore!

They were quite like the RENT BOYZ moi met up with. Just as angry. But I am not sure why.

Doray's sister who was conversing outside my door in Tamil sounded angry too. There were "bastards...bitches..." interspersed in her voice.

The only consolation to an angry person is another angry person. WE ANGRY TOGETHER! Or we get a comedian or a lovey-dovey like the KOREAN BOYZ or that cute Catholic High boyz with big eyes whom I would love for a "son" and we get cured!

ALL YOU FUCKING BASTARDS OUT THERE, FUCK YOU! For whatever reasons you are screwing up our lives! YOU WILL BURN IN HELL AND I WON'T SAY A PRAYER FOR YOU AT ALL!

FUCK YOU ONCE AGAIN!