Dark Ages

Neologism

I will blog on the "Dark Ages" as soon as I am ready ok. Quit giving me the stares! For the precious moment, take this to be the electronic game's version of the "Dark Ages", which I am beginning to see quite a lot of as screen savers at the LAN shops.

If you haven't noticed, almost all the gamers are dudes and they have shops named after their boners. And you thought it was the Local Area Network, didn't you? *Shame on you.

The other things you would have noticed by now, are the proliferation of "neologism" in my blogs. But I have to explain a couple so you get their intended meanings right. "Salsa", as far as I want them to be, means two things. One, hot steamy sex or two, the hot, sexy and sexual ambience of a place.

So if Microsoft is so entrenched in our lives as is Google, we should have words like "Microsofting" where I say : "I am doing a spot of Microsofting right now, dude." Kinda like a present continuous kinda tense. Geddit?

Statistical Doo-dah

We are a nation of statistics. Every little venture we make, we espouse statistics like we eat hotdogs or frankfurters for lunch, dinner and supper (by the way, I had one yesterday evening and it was G-O-O-D, I tell yea).

For example, statistically speaking, for every one dude who is born into this world, one point five gall is born somewhere else, like in the frost-bitten, God-forsaken tundras? Now how the statisticians envisage a half-gal is beyond the logic of this blog. Ask the economists. Or even better, the politicans.

Now, presupposing, just for the sake of argument, that He-Ape dishes out his pamphlets on an average of four times a year and he has been at this dastardly act for 19 years, and unfortunately, 1 million of these get into the hands of our unsuspecting population. That will be an astounding , mind-blowing 76 million times the grammatical errors wheezing around our tiny island state. That can only mean ONE thing: Close your damned "school", you over-bloated gorilla.

Copernican Universe

If He-Ape believes that an experienced educator teaches "off the top of his head" (as he puts it and laughing his fat stinky arse-hole to the bank while doing this), this can mean ANOTHER thing: This ''educator" prolly didn't put much effort or new thought into his teaching. He may have repeated the same outmoded stuff not once, not twice, but a zillionth time despite new literature proving otherwise. He might as well be a BARBIE or KEN dollie.

Once again the heat is on. This time, some liberated country is being chastised for condoning gay marriages and gay civil unions. I can't see how this is a BAD thing. A homelife with foster kids means a stable "family nucleus". If the true dartboard is to be darted, it should be the temptations all around us that threaten not only gays' but straights' family lives. If you can't get a helio-centred universe right, don't expect to get this one right either.

Aim Well And Keep Our Public Toilets Clean And Dry (The Mechanics Of Urination)

We have perhaps just gone a little over the knife's edge with our toilet campaigns. Yes keeping our toilets clean may sound like a possible task (what if we were trudging outside where mud and grass are the order of the day? do you expect us to clean our shoes' soles first before entering the loo?) . Aiming well and keeping them dry is next to impossible.

My foreskin may, for some reasons, be retracted at some point in time. Like my zipper or buttons or pubic hair got in the way or the frictional force (F=ma) between me phallus and undies didn't exactly help either. Or my various standing, squatting and sitting positions weren't exactly aligned.

I unlock my jean's buttons, pull out my cock, I am on high tide, the urine squirts out in a gush but in a terribly wrong way because the urethra was obstructed by me foreskin. What do you propose I do? Massage my dick? Pull its skin apart? Or hold it down?

The toilet is a wet area. You wash your hands in the sink, some taps have water gushing and splashing, others trickle and when you wash, you just wash. Water is splayed everywhere. How on Gaia's earth can it ever be kept dry, as some charwomen would have you believe you could, creeping up on you and staring you to a ghastly death if you didn't.

Singapore Idol

I know it is prolly the teeny-boppers who voted the most. But look who they voted out! Norman Then (not that he is the judges' fav choice, going by their comments)! I thought he did his song pretty well as he did his previous songs. I feel so sorry for him (as I did Joakim Gomez when the segment of his family breakup got aired). It will shatter his mama's heart as well, who isn't exactly in the pink of health right now.

All save one will be booted out in the final scheme of things anyway. So if you have to go, you may as well go now, right? All twelve are Singapore Idols in their own ways. It is just that one will be THE Singapore Idol , right?

His younger days' photographs show up a impish little devil with dimpled smiles and cheeky eyes. I hope his education in school didn't beat back his boyish spirit too much (if the teachers' complaints about him at school are anything to go by) and "moulded" him to be just like everyone of us here. MORONIC, ZOMBIED, GROWN-UP (define this please and don't tell me being a corporate pig or cheat is) AND MONOLITHIC.

When I picked Nurul the other time, it was because she sang the song "Emotions" her own sui generis way. Madonna doesn't do Whitney Houston songs. She does her own repertoire written just for her voice. I can't name singers who are so versatile, they can croon, do a ballad, a slow or a fast or a loud number (maybe Celine Dion?). Jay Lim proved he could.

It is gonna be neck and neck, this competition, I tell yea. The gals are getting better too. Rahimah Rahim did a real nice number as compared to her last time, as far as I am concerned. Mathilda shone with her James Bond "Goldfinger" rendition. I am not too sure about the other gals though.

Dark Ages (Incognito And In Brief)

Might as well. While I was hypnopompoic, I drifted into Never Never Land. I had to. Kill the pain. Snuff out the bad thoughts. Obliterate the emotions brewing within me. Hey, I even tried killing myself.

I got hold of sleeping pills and gobbled them all. It is so easy getting these pills. But perhaps the kind doctor had better sense of what I was up to and gave me a low-dosage prescription. I don't know. But I didn't die. I paid a call on a Chinese physician and was duly prescribed a kinda syrup for my "sleep disorder". Again he may have known what I was trying to do to myself. I didn't die a second time.

All I know was I drifted into sleep as I lay in bed, thinking I could end this miserable life of mine. But sleep was all that it was as it turned out. I didn't have the guts to fling myself off a high-rise or slash myself ( I won't know what jugular to go for anyhow though I know some had tried this in the army. Not sure what the success rate is).

That ended my life-taking episode. After that, it was just staying frozen in time, comatose and drifting into Sleeping Beauty's deepest slumber. I guess this was also how I managed to preserve myself pretty well. My faculties intact. My passion and love unscathed. My belief in good still burning. I may have waited for a kiss a tad too long too but this didn't materialise. *Smirks at Dwayne and Co.

For 10 long years, while living on my own, I found myself. I got rid of my old self and all its despicable shove-it-down-my-throat humbug that society, my family and everyone else threw in my way. I re-wired myself believing new beliefs and values. To be who I really AM. I experienced and followed what worked for me and me alone.

I just hope my time out here now "among humanity" will not diminish or dent my self worth or outlook or identity too much for me to be hypnopompoic all over again. Because I may really DIE this time round.