I blog only because there are nagging issues I feel I wanna comment on , general observations I make which may or may not be true or some preoccupation that caught and piqued my interest like my recent blogs on "who is who" and "who is behind a brand name" on the retail scene.
It is amazing to discover that the "Fox" retail brand is Israeli. Amazing in itself because that is coming from a historically biblical, war-torn and war-ravaged country. It goes to show that the order of life, trade and commerce goes on despite chaos.
Then there is that whole mass of interesting but intricate partnerships, joint-ventures, buy-ins and buy-outs, mergers and acquisitions among our luxury brand BOYS which ultimately boils down to the BIG THREE Players. Like the BIG FOUR (or is it now down to 2 or 3?) of the banking or accounting world.
Finally, discovering the roots and beginnings of some of the retail brands are just mind-blowing. Hugo Boss dressed up the Nazi Officers while Dior dressed their wives and their French collaborators for World War 2. And Bata, a Czech-based company, started off as a military shoe supplier during World War 1.
In fact this is the kinda of life-skill education I find more relevant, more contemporary and more practicum-based.
Writing also appeals to me as some kinda therapy and because I do enjoy writing essays to a certain extent, perhaps dating back to my General Paper days of junior college life. Particularly subjects and topics that are of immediate existential concerns. Topics that I write on in my blogs.
In the absence of flesh and blood friends to share your thoughts and feelings, writing is the next best outlet for that expression. In any case, friends, family, colleagues and whoever else CANNOT be there 24/7 to share ALL your EXISTENTIAL experiences EVERY MOMENT OF THE DAY.
Writing can. It helps you make sense of your experiences for the day, what you learned, your reflection on issues, events and it helps you consolidate and work out your feelings and thoughts.
Besides you can't say anything so freely and openly in someone's face, can you? Writing provides that safe distance for saying what you REALLY wanna say though of course the spectre of a LIBEL suit is always there?
I rather be a critic because too many are already singing praises, at most times un-necessarily while overlooking the obvious faults and defects. Let them do the flattery while I put forth the constructive and legitimate criticisms.
For betterment and for change.
Money As An End And As A Means In Itself
Losing all that money wasn't painful because of the money for its own sake really.
It was painful because it meant the house, that higher education, that retirement money, that money for existential living RIGHT NOW and contingencies that come right along with it.
For me an abode is about space (do you wanna live in an old stuffy leaking dollhouse which costs the same price as a luxury Daimler AG?), quiet, peace, tranquility, modernity, cleanliness and privacy. No nosey parkers, no interfering, no snooping, no trespassing, no fish-bowl living, no rundown dilapidated and rebuilding works needed and the whole works.
Plus my old luggages were mildewy, mouldy and green with algae and it has been four years. And those silverfishes.
I am also of a certain age, not exactly in the best of health, tired , not so energetic and so on. In short, NUAH......
Alvin Is Right Of Course -Looks, Flawless Complexion And Youth
Looks and built matter. Youth , a smooth and flawless complexion. None of which I possess very fully or even at all. But at my age, I have a bit more confidence and reckon that as long as I keep fit and the facial scars and lines away, I can still live with myself.
Unfortunate as it sounds, they are the first few things that attract, in this age of beauty and wellness fuelled by the media and everyone else. Inner beauty takes longer to stir and may never even happen.
Alvin brought this unconscious of mine back to the conscious. For a very long time, I was actually afraid to look at myself in the mirror. Any mirror untill like more recently.
And I may unconsciously wanna rip my face off too when I ripped and shredded all those articles of personal belongings in a rage of self-destruction.
The Whole Gay Community Was Here ! At Ion Orchard's Soft Opening
They were here. Togged out handsomely and youthfully. A famous blogger (sexuality: unknown but hey love your new muscle dude and your longer hair and oh yeah, fairer than fair complexion and set of pearlie whites). My ex-tenant. His new or is it old boyfriend. Everyone.
The whole gliterrati? And illuminati? Or literati?
Luxury Brands Are Beyond The Mean Average Monthly Wages Of An Average Professional - Or At Least For A Month Or So
While I may have taken to gaping at luxury brands, their price tags of $2600 a piece for a ready-to-wear apparel and a couple of hundred of bucks for an accessory are certainly well beyond my means or the monthly average wages of an average professional.
Or at least he needs to wait several months before he can lay his hands on one. It is not like small ticket items of below a hundred bucks.
Get that right too people.
And I am gaping only because they are works of art. The fine fabrics and tailoring, the ummatched authentic skins and material. The exquisite, finely crafted design and stitches. The color. The works.
What I Meant Was This............
When I wrote about that single white male I spotted at "Love Of Siam"and that he seemed visibly distraught, I meant that he was perhaps overwhelmed by the direction of that moovie. Of an evolving relationship that finally lead to a heavy smooching.
He seemed like he couldn't handle that emotion, coming as I thought he did from a diet of the West's culture of fast and furious lust and sex. Meet, wham and BAM! Sex (to the nth degree) As we all are conditioned to at some point in our life by the media.
Of course I am just second-guessing and we all know it can BE WRONG.
And this event brings me to my next point.
Open Up, Be Open And We Can All Cavort In Open Gay Sex.....TADA!
There will be no question of extortion, emotional or financial blackmail, discrimination or behind-my-back gossip if everyone accepts everyone else for who they are.
Look, by now, everyone knows I am gay. They may not know me in person but I am sure there are others who do.
If it becomes a norm and nobody has any hangups, THEN who can kick up a BIG FUSS and make a big DEAL out of nothing? Nobody right?
In fact it becomes a good thing. We can all come out in the open. Hang out. Brazenly. Openly. Unabashedly AND CAVORT IN OPEN GAY SEX....
Tada!
You Know What, This Counselling Program Wasn't That Bad After All
I am into the last two modules of my program.
Despite having said what I said and all the emotionally distressing and frustrating moments that happened in my life (breakups and financial losses) and during the learning program (all the past and present crises I have to face up to), I finally came to ONE BIG CONCLUSION.
My counselling program DID help me survive it all. If not for it, telling me to focus on my glimmer of hope and yes, unfinished businesses, and dissipating or displacing anger in a safer way (is that why sometimes potentially lethal martial arts classes like tae-kwondo still hold court?) I really might have just ended my life.
Thank you Mr/M/s/Mrs/Miss/Dr Counselling Program!
General Comments About The Modules
While I still believe that being financially strapped and too emotionally laden like I am at this moment means I probably have no business counselling the poor (and they do need some financial handouts, no? ) and the equally if not more emotionally burdened, there are a couple of things I wanna highlight.
Ethics was a fiasco through no fault of Chris, really, because that is just the way things are. GC helped me through my crises by talking about it with a group while I had an interest in psychology so FP was interesting.
Despite everything, I find Chris' predisposition model flawless, the FACTS@Life, the Fear and Trigger models real but they needed some refinements and I couldn't apply the second half of the FACTS model and his "Trigger" model.
When I wrote the CM essay, I happened to identify more with the spiral model. CT imbibed me with all the ready facts and theories of counselling and I loved that and today, CI was the best. It helped mediate my current financial crisis.
While I enjoyed the sharing of experiences of the lecturers, their anecdotes and travelogues but because the award of the certificate hinges on passing the assignment and exams, this has to be negatively discounted. So exam tips, revision and concept checks were prized instead.
I look forward to the modules of CC and CS coming up next.
What I Meant By Intellectual Rigour.........
I suppose there are constraints.
But sometimes the seminars were just too much of a monologue. There were not very many chances of an exchange, of discussion or debate.
And can we be as open as we want with the class? What about supposedly taboo topics like "suicide" and "homosexuality" .Or will we risk penalising ourselves with the lecturers? For instance with their God-given-and-God-imbued values? Or their personal beliefs and value systems.
Everyone has them, even you and me.
When there were opportunities like during my FP module, I was facing my own set of personal problems and floored by them. So psycho-somatic, current and past physiological, emotional and psychological states play a part
This was what I thought was most lacking in the program apart from my earlier blogs about the language proficiency issues, some accented communication problems, the material in terms of its presentation of facts, the grammar, word usage and language construction.
Plus don't expect us to agree with everything. We have to agree to disagree on some points raised.
It will be a very sad day indeed if legitimate and constructive criticiscms are not taken in its own proper context or people cannot have that degree of freedom of expression or of speech or of writing.
And to be enunciating their views without fear of reprisal or penalty.
And The Assessment Modes.......
And exams are just exams and I don't really like them. Memory work, recalling, getting to the exam venue, the people in the exam hall and when you are down and out, you could be impaired?
Can't concentrate, memory lapses, you stutter, you have eating disorders, etc.
Maybe just assignments?
But I can't really be sure which option or if both is best.
It All Finally Happened......
What happened in the last few weeks meant that it all finally happened.
My world crumbled and my whole immune system broke down. I was down with cough, flu, fever, rashes, aches, pains, depression, drifting in and out between sleep disorders like insomnia and sleeping all the time and get this.....constipation......
To keep a tight lid on our anger is just overcontrolling and overdoing anger management......we have to let loose and let go at times except in a safer way.....
P$
Does this mean I can get my money back? Capital, stamp duty plus profit and interest? Isn't too much to ask, is it?
I promise I will be good from now on? Plea$e????
*$mile$* *Wink$* *$ob$ $ob$ $ob$* Whateva
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